I am not here to recount the bad memories, Slavery, Discrimination, Jim Crow, ghetto communities with limited municipal services, divisive racial politics. It hurts too much and brings tears to my eyes. I also do not write this so my white friends can feel guilt. Its not your fault, Its mine.
It's me who have failed to end the relationship. I have failed to make the adjustments and demand more from my abusive spouse. I have even failed my children. By children, I mean the families I have left behind. The 50% drop out rate in urban communities, the 20% unemployment, the welfare mentality I let my spouse engrain in my relatives and the soft racism of low expectations that I allowed my families to adopt. Yes, that is my baggage, not the USA. Sure , many of my family have done well in this system as we progressed by the rules, but was that enough.
Can I do more. As my spouse tells me that we are all good, should I keep working to save this relationship. YES and NO.
I will always love my wife, my country, my USA, the red white and blue. I have shed to much blood and tears to leave, and like family, I will never let another country bad mouth my wife. I will always defend Lady Liberty. I am simply engaging couples counseling.
But is it time to look elsewhere, for another spouse that may offer more. That is a painful and gut wrenching decision. I can only compare this to the decision of George Washington. How after defending the Queen against the French at Detroit, he could then turn against his Country, his Honor and fight against Mother England for nothing more than an ideal. Recently, I have met people from El Salvador, Isreal, Ecuador, Canada, and Britain that emigrated legally to the United States, owned business in the USA but have made the tough decision to take thier expertise gained in the United Staes to Costa Rica.
For this African American, my solution is to build communities in the spirit of American Beach, Florida, Bruce Beach, California and Highland Beach, Maryland both inside and outside the United States of America. Communities stared in the spirit if freedom from oppresion and discrimination. For this Africa American, I am joint venturing with developers, land owners and builders to dream more, achieve more and reactivate lives with a new purpose.
On the aniversary of Dr. Kings, "I Have a Dream" speach and my 50th Birthday, my reality is to expand, not contract, to grow, not die and to gain not loose. Lets work together around the globe to create communities free from the limitations of racial confines and full of the joys of world heritage. Lets rededicate ourselves to peace, unity, and prosperity.
My family, the USA and I are working on our problems. Our democracy, challenges and all, will correct itself. It always does, and that makes our marraige stronger.